I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Randomize
