I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Be still, my beating vagina.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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