And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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