Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Princesses don't give blow jobs
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
