literally had 100 drinks last night.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize