do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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