That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
