google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
i drank out of a bidet.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
