maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Randomize