forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
