Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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