Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
