Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
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