She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
