ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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