Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
