Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Randomize
