i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
