Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
