There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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