She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
