so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
