Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Randomize
