I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Randomize
