Dual....:-)
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
