1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
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