Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
