my sisters under your porch take her home
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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