He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
