Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
