new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
