If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
either way he was missing a nipple.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
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