Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Randomize
