Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
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