Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
he laminated a picture of his dick.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
