Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
party gras won. party gras always wins.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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