So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
