Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
