brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
Randomize
