What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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