I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
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