Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
