i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
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