But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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