Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Randomize
