there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
