after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
