No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Randomize