I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
