I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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