I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Randomize
